It's okay to ask for things. It's okay to say no.

Negotiation is hard, but we make it harder by trying to game out every possible outcome: If I say this, they'll say that. If I offer this, they'll counter here, and then we can land at this spot.

Ugh.

I sent a proposal to a prospect. They wrote back saying that they were all in and ready to sign the contract — except they’d rather pay me less.

I don’t want to get paid less.

Some folks would just say yes: They’d rather have the client and some guaranteed revenue. I understand that perspective. But as I’ve said before, you don’t lose a deal by countering. No interested party walks away simply because you negotiate. Negotiation is a conversation.

This particular prospect proposed a plan where the more hours they used, the lower my hourly rate would become. They also wanted me to let unused hours roll over to the next month.

I struggle to agree to either of those terms: My rate is my rate, and if I commit to a lot of hours, making my hourly income get worse because we’re spending more time together kind of stinks for me. And because I’m judicious and careful about allocating my time, rollover feels borderline impossible: If I’ve committed to a full schedule of hours for next month, rolling over your unused hours means I have to work more hours than exist. That’s no good for anyone.

So I said no. I explained the above.

The prospect wrote back a day later and said okay. We’re moving forward.

I don’t in any way begrudge the client asking to spend less: It’s smart. I’d do the same.

But here, I didn’t try to meet in the middle or find a compromise position where I’d feel bad about closing. I didn’t see the discounts they were after and offer less of a discount, or try to guess where they were hoping to land. I told them what I needed, how I operate, and why.

They accepted.

It can be scary to counter! I understand the nervousness. But you can project confidence — whether you feel it or not — and thus negotiate from a position of strength.